Work and Other Things
At this point in my career, I remain confused as to whether it is a blessing or a curse to be good at many things. Which is to say, I am not good at many things in a broad sense but that when it comes to words, I am good at the many ways one may apply that gift. I write fiction and nonfiction, am a copywriter and a digital marketer, create strange projects and undertake long-form investigations. Is this good or is this bad? I have no idea.
The ad world
Not long ago, I went to Miami to talk to some ad agencies about doing some copywriting work for them. So far, those interviews have not led anywhere. Why is this the case? I'm not sure. Maybe it is: my freelance status, my overall vibe, my doesn't-fit-into-a-box-edness. There were some issues that presented themselves during the process. One: Anyone who interviews me has googled me, which means that they know I've written extensively about pornography. Two: There had been a several year gap between when I had been doing copywriting last and my interest in it now, which was due to the fact that I had cancer and then got better. Both of these topics ended up being addressed directly in the interviews, which I had decided beforehand was the best way to handle them. But was I right? I don't know.
Reality TV is calling
Because internet, I had a producer approach me about developing an idea for a reality TV show. This ended up being a great time. I really enjoyed doing this. It was fun. In fact, I was going to list a few words after "fun," but when I wrote the word "fun," I realized that's what I liked most about it. It was fun. It wasn't stressful or deadly serious or an impossible task. It was enjoyable. It was entertainment. I have done some TV show producing and developing in the past. When I was on Playboy TV, I would bring the executive producers story ideas, and sometimes I gave input on scripts, and that sort of thing. At FX, I did some segment producing on a show called "The X Show," which was like that network's "The Man Show," and I did this Comedy Central-esque recurring feature in which I played someone called "The Manvocate," where I would seek out ways in which men were being exploited. I think the first one we did was on male porn stars being paid less than female porn stars. I think there was another one on male circumcision that was really weird and maybe would be best to forget about. I also forgot until I was working on this new show that years ago I actually had my own TV pilot, based on my old blog, which I went to New York to pitch, and met with I think it was MTV and VH1 and maybe Oxygen. That was a bit of a train wreck. But also a learning experience? One hopes.
Out, damned words
I have spent most of my career failing at being accepted by the New York publishing world. In maybe 2008, I put together a book proposal, got an agent, and that failed to sell. This time around, I couldn't even get an agent. Most agents didn't even respond after I submitted the two proposals I'd spent a long time getting solid. I hate agents, and the New York publishing world can suck my dick. That's my light bulb moment, right there. And fuck Oprah. Anyway, I'm working on a novel. May all the agents who ignored me suffer at the hands of fate.
Support the arts! Buy a digital copy of THE TUMOR, a "masterpiece of short fiction" by me, Susannah Breslin.